Wanna know why the Chiefs are undefeated? Pizza Rolls. As my Dad says, always trust a big man on food. Well, Andy Reid is a big man and he knows what is up.
You don’t get that big off of salad. Fuck salad. The mixture of carbohydrates and processed meats in a pizza roll is the answer. You want to know how to dominate punt, pass, and kick before you even fire a rocket? Pizza Rolls. You can probably answer almost every single question about Andy Reid with pizza rolls.
The only way the Chiefs lose a game is if the master of clock management buys the wrong pizza rolls. Yeah I’m talking about cheese pizza rolls. Now a cheese pizza roll would mean a close loss. If Andy puts on his sleep apnea mask and settles in for a long winters nap and the cheese pizza rolls are overcooked the Chiefs will be blown out. The other scenario would be if the o-line eats them right out of the oven. We all know the inside of a pizza roll right out of the oven is equivalent to molten hot lava. A burnt mouth will turn the o-line against the whole team. As a third string junior varsity offensive lineman I know for a fact the o-line is the most important part of the team. Without the line Alex Smith will be murdered and Kareem Hunt can kiss his yards goodbye.